Kalia’s Birth Story *unmedicated*

On May 1, while at a monitoring appt for my gestational diabetes, I "watched" my real first contraction happen. I had been having Braxton hicks for weeks and started to feel like they were changing and getting serious, but I wasn't convinced till I actually saw it happen! The number climbed as my belly tightened, and I knew my body was preparing once again, to deliver a precious soul earth-side. But this was only the beginning of 4 long weeks of contractions, getting ready for baby girl! For the next few weeks, as I spent 20 minutes at a time, twice a week, being monitored, I wouldn't go another full appointment without seeing a contraction happen! They were exhausting and made me extremely anxious, but I tried to enjoy those last days pregnant and feeling all the kicks and wiggles inside my belly! That is my very favorite part of pregnancy after all!

As we inched closer to my due date, it became very clear to me we weren't going to reach it! With a little bit of added stress from my diabetic doctor, who insisted I be induced at 39 weeks, I sure wanted this babe to come on her own! My doctor made it clear from my very first appointment that she thought I should be induced. The problem was, her reasoning was never consistent. Every appointment she found a reason and tried to convince me that's what I needed, but every appointment she had to come up with something new. It was a terribly defeating feeling and I was not happy with the idea of being induced while still trying to go naturally.

At my last appointment with her, I was in the middle of telling her nurse who always took my blood pressure and checked my fluids, that my friend had lost her baby just two days before, at 34 weeks. This lead to my blood pressure reading a bit high. Denise, who was with me at every single monitoring appointment (the doctor only saw me at a select few since I was there twice a week) noted how abnormal it was for me to have high blood pressure since every other appointment I was "perfect". Since I was just telling her about my friend, she realized that could have caused it, and told me she'd take it again in a few minutes. When she did, I was fine. But that wasn't good enough for the doctor who of course was set to see me that day, and she came in once again trying to convince me I needed to be induced. I had told her the week before that I really didn't think I'd make it through the weekend still pregnant, but there I was. So, of course, she used that against me and now that I was beyond the 39-week mark, she wanted me to go get induced like that minute. I, of course, said no, and for the most part, refused to listen to her. She didn't like that. So she called my midwife and told me I needed to go see her that day and come to a decision of when the "end" would be.

I had a few appointments already set for that day so I continued with my day and went to see my midwife right in the midst of my appointments! When I did, I expressed my concern with my doctor, and in her inconsistencies. I didn't understand why a doctor who wasn't going to be delivering me, wanted me to be induced so bad! And that was the only thing she was consistent about, the desire for me to be induced. During my visit with my midwife, who I absolutely LOVE, she checked my dilation. I had not progressed at all throughout the week before and the weekend, though I was so sure I had! I told her the Sunday before, I ended up putting my bags in the car because I was sure we were that close! So I was shocked when I hadn't progressed at all during that time! Once she informed me of my lack of progression, she asked if I wanted her to strip my membranes. Since she had asked the week before and I refused, giving my body a chance to progress on its own, and it hadn't, I agreed to have her do it! That was painful. But it worked!

After having 3 babies now, I've figured out that "active labor" is the point in time when your contractions start, get consistent, and stay consistent until the baby is born! When I left my midwife's office, I had one more appointment. On my way home from that appointment, I hadn't had consistent contractions for most of the day. When I pulled up in my driveway, I had to sit there for a minute and finish timing my third or fourth contraction on the drive home. Even though I'd felt "active labor" contractions for about a week at this point, I started REAL active labor at about 6 pm on Tuesday night. With Isaiah, once contractions like this started, it was only a few hours before we were headed to the hospital and I had made it to a 7! So when these contractions got to be close to that intense and frequent, I called my best friend who was going to be taking video! I didn't want to wait too long and have her be rushing like crazy since she lives 15 minutes away.

It was bedtime, so I called my mom and dad to come over and help put the boys to bed, so husband could help me if things got too tough and so I didn't have to try to get them to bed through contractions. Then I remembered my brother and his fiancé wanted to know when things got "real" so I let my brother know it was baby time! He selfishly said as he walked in the door "man I was hoping you'd wait till the 23rd"! He's a 23rd baby and Tuesday was the 22! haha Little did he know, that wish would be granted! So here I am, a house full of people, sitting on my birth ball while my parents got the boys to bed, my best friend got her camera ready, my brother let his fiancé know to get dressed and ready, and husband was ready for me to need him. My personal saving grace and pain relief during a natural labor and delivery is counter pressure on my hips from my husband. That's about all I needed all through birth with Isaiah, and I fully intended it to be about the same for this one!

I sat and bounce on my labor ball (yoga ball) while I chatted with my best friend, mom, brother, and husband. It was such a peaceful time. I started to get up and pee frequently (comparing to Isaiah, this was normal and meant we were getting somewhere), but I just kept waiting for my contractions to get TOO hard. I remember starting to call for husband during contractions with Isaiah before we headed to the hospital. I wanted to be that far along once we got there. I did NOT want to get sent home, but I also wanted to get as far along as possible at home before going in! When I had Isaiah, I checked into the hospital dilated to a 7, and he was out in less than an hour. My total "active labor" being less than 6 hours. Everyone warned me how quickly baby #3 would come, so I was in such a fragile place of wanting to labor at home as long as possible again, and not wanting to have a baby in the car!

After laboring for a few hours, surrounded by people I love, I felt it was time to head in. It was about 11-11:30 at this point and my entire labor with Isaiah was less than 6 hours. We were hitting that 6-hour mark or pretty intense and really consistent contractions. So I at least felt like I needed to go get checked and see if I had dilated. Really I think it was more feeling the obligation since I'd labored so long with everyone here and it was all a false alarm! :[ As soon as we got in the car everything stopped. I think I had one or two contractions on the entire 8-minute drive. But we were already on our way so we just went in!

We checked in at about 12:30 am on the 23rd (Wednesday) to triage. Since it was late, we came in through the ER entrance and I was wheeled up to the Labor and Delivery floor and taken straight into triage! (hallelujah) Once I got in a gown and settled in the bed and onto monitors, they checked my dilation. The nurse that checked me said "welllll, you're at a tight 3"! Aka, I'm being generous in giving you a 3! hahaha I was SO bummed! So she walked out for a minute and came back and said hang tight and I will check you again in an hour. So I asked if I could get up and move. She asked if I'd like to walk for an hour and I said absolutely! I wanted to get up and move around, not be hooked up to monitors, and of course, help my progression! So husband and I headed out the halls of Labor and Delivery, and started our laps!

After an hour of walking, with contractions getting more intense and more frequent, we headed back to my bed in triage to wait for the nurse. Once she came in she got me all hooked back up to the monitors and such, my contractions were showing up stronger and more frequent than before, but still manageable. Once she checked me, she informed me I was STILL at a tight 3! :[ So I said okay what happens next? She said we'll send you home. At this point I was beyond exhausted and ready to head home and at least try to get some rest. Of course, this time it was real!

We went home and husband fell asleep instantly! It took me a minute to get settled into bed, but once I did I was able to get some kind of rest. I was in a place of being asleep enough to not really remember contractions, but I could still feel them. And awake enough that when I was finally fully awake again, I didn't feel well rested. At about 4:30 my contractions got intense and frequent enough that they were keeping me fully awake. I kept trying to go back to sleep through them, adjust my body in a way to find comfort, and close my eyes. It wasn't working. So at 5 am I got out of bed. I checked on the boys and started to bounce on my ball. I knew once I woke up husband, he was gonna be up for good, for the remainder of labor! So I tried to let him sleep as long as I could before waking him up. I text my mom at about 6 to see if she was awake. I didn't want to call yet because if she wasn't awake yet, I didn't want to bug her quite yet! I continued to work through contractions on my own. Walking around my house, sitting in our rocking chair, and bouncing on my ball. I was doing whatever I could to manage pain by myself, before waking up husband. Charlie woke up about that time too! He snuggled me for a minute then I told him to go lay with daddy to rest a little longer. At 6:30-45 I had to start waking husband up with each contraction to get counter pressure on my hips. For 30 minutes or so, he kept falling asleep between contractions! So he would wake up, sit at the edge of our bed to reach my hips, then lay back down and fall asleep. It was kind of hilarious and I was glad he was continuing to rest! Because I knew I was going to need him and neither of us had gotten much sleep throughout the night!

Around 7 I finally called my mom (or maybe she called me when she saw my text) and I asked if she could come over and help get Charlie ready for school and get the boys breakfast! I knew it was only gonna be a little bit before my contractions would start to get TOO hard, and I'd be ready to head to the hospital. I also knew I didn't have the energy or focus to get Charlie dressed for school or feed them both breakfast! I told her no rush, but to get dressed and head over with my dad. They live a block away, so I wasn't too worried about them having to rush. At this point, I finally woke up husband and asked him to get out of bed and get ready. I told him mom and dad were on their way and we should probably head to the hospital when they got there! They walked in about 7:30, just in time for my contractions to get pretty unbearable. By the time we were headed out the door, I was hunched over the counter through each one and really focused on my breathing. We headed to the hospital at just about 8:00!

When we got there, I'd informed them I was there the night before and walked in triage for about an hour. I'd love to tell you that got me out of the page and a half of paperwork and that I was able to just go back and get settled......nope! haha Once I filled out my paper we were sent back to triage and got settled in again, and waited to have my dilation checked! My contractions at this point were consistently coming every 3 minutes or so and a minute or more long! They were intense, getting only tougher, and keeping me focused on my breathing. When the nurse came in to check my dilation I was nervous. I wanted to have progressed even at all, but I was hoping I was at least close to what I was with Isaiah when I checked in (which was a 7). In about 5-6 hours since leaving, I had progressed.......to a FOUR! I was so bummed. BUT, they said they were going to admit me! {praise hands}

I was so excited! We were having a baby! They told me it would just be a little bit until they got a room cleaned up and ready for us and just to hang tight! I asked to get up to go potty a couple times but they wanted me to stay monitored as much as possible. Which meant I had to be mostly still, laid on my back, and not getting counter pressure. I was having a hard time with that so I asked if I could do intermittent monitoring. The nurse had to call and have that approved by my midwife. In the meantime, as I was laid down and was still having contractions (because, of course, these things wait for no one haha) I got really deep in my mind and breathing and just stayed so focused! I had been getting counter pressure off and on from husband, but during one whole contraction when a midwife came in to check on me, I tried really hard to just stay calm and breathe through, and it worked! So for a while, I continued just trying to get through them on my own with my breath. One contraction at a time, I just kept breathing and rocking. Things stayed VERY consistent and I didn't realize how long we had been in triage until we finally got into a room TWO hours later! Finally around 11:30 we were moved into our labor and delivery room.

Once we got into our room, my nurse wanted to check my dilation, since we hadn't since I checked in around 8:30. Since my contractions hadn't gotten any worse I didn't think I'd really dilated that much. The entire time in triage I was getting through contractions all on my own, as they stayed super consistent. Their intensity and frequency persisted through the whole 2 hours, but they hadn't gotten worse. So I expected to hear that I had made it to maybe a 5. I was absolutely shocked when she checked me and said that I was at a very ripe 7! {ripe is describing the readiness of my cervix} My best friend was working all this time and got off around 11:30 so I told her to head straight to the hospital, because I knew at this point it was gonna go fast, and boy did it! The next part lasted less than an hour and went SO quickly.

One contraction at a time truly makes an hour feel no longer than 20 minutes! So as soon as we got in the room my nurse told me my midwife had approved the intermittent monitoring which meant I didn't have to have the monitors strapped to me anymore. She would come in every 20 minutes to check the baby's heart rate with the handheld Doppler and then every hour I would get back on the strapped monitors for just 20 minutes. It sounded much more pleasant to me as I worked through contractions. So she checked on the baby's heart rate right then since I had just moved and we weren't being monitored for a minute, found it quickly and simply, and then it got real serious. She checked me again to see if I was dilating quickly at this point and if she should call my midwife. I was at an EIGHT! This was in about 20 minutes, you guys!!! She dimmed the lights as I started to ask for husband's help through each contraction and had found a comfy spot on my left side. I was moaning/humming through each contraction and I knew it was gonna be quick. She came in again and reminded me to let her know right away if my water broke or if I felt an urge to push. Neither was happening yet, but if husband walked away from me, I was yelling at him! I was 100% dependant on him at this point, and when you hear me talk about not being able to do it without him, this is what I'm referring to! Every contraction would start and I would have him push, HARD, on either side of my hips to help manage the pain. I watched my nurse look at her phone and start to get nervous as my moans got louder, longer, and my midwife wasn't there yet! She continued to remind me to let her know if anything changed, if my water broke or if I felt the urge to push. Just then, I felt it in my bum.

I turned from my left side to my back because I was feeling almost ready to push. At the exact same moment, my midwife walked in. She told me at first not to push. I panicked and asked, "what do you mean don't push??". Husband saw the panic in my face and told me to look at him and breathe. I was having a break in between contractions, my first in quite a while, so I breathed deep and relaxed. At about that same time I felt pressure and I said out loud "She's COMING!" No one believed me or was ready, and when my next contraction started I was pushing. Along with my first push my water broke. I reached down to feel baby girl's head come out, and could feel all of her hair!! This is the first time I felt the desire to do that and I was so happy I did. I felt like I was truly in charge of my delivery and was able to give birth exactly how I wanted to! It was amazing and beautiful. With a push and a half, baby girl was out! She was on my chest, with a head full of dark hair just like her brothers, and absolutely perfect! I couldn't believe it had all happened so fast. I was overwhelmed by a rush of emotions and a sweet spirit! I've never felt closer to heaven than at that moment! Being a momma is my single proudest accomplishment in this life, and I had brought another tiny human into the world! My mom, husband, and best friend were there with me, and it could not have been better! My sweet baby girl has ARRIVED! <3